one of my favorite things about living in this small-ish town is that for, like, 37 american dollars you can become a season ticket-holder at the local symphony plus it’s five minutes from your crib and you can park out front and also not dress up because it’s chill like that. we got tickets for this season of the kalamazoo symphony orchestra and not to be insane about it, BUT: maybe the best cultural investment of my life??? we live in hell and i am addicted to the internet’s poison but it really is nice to sit in a dark, gigantic auditorium and watch another human being do something beautiful that you know they’ve spent years practicing to get good at that is deeply fulfilling and a good reminder of what it is to be a person. anyway, we went to last night’s kso performance of aaron copland’s appalachian spring and i didn’t doze off even one time!
i love paul scheer and i just started listening to the audiobook of joyful recollections of trauma and everyone else probably should, too. i have a hard time listening to novels on audio; i start daydreaming and lose track of the story, and the secondhand embarrassment i get from the narrator doing character voices makes me want to stick pencils in my ears. but an autobiographical audiobook is such a dream, intimate but not, kind of like an extremely long voice note from your new friend. paul’s got a good voice and as a comic he knows how to tell a fucking story, and i might be biased but people with gap teeth are more fun and interesting to listen to.
current best snack: turkish dried figs
first runner up: saba chips
second runner up
is starstruck the greatest show i have ever seen in my life? possibly! i’m really into a romantic comedy, always have been; bridget jones’s diary and marian keyes entire oeuvre are the reasons i started writing, straight up. please give me a mean and/or boorish and/or unconventionally attractive lead who grinds some hot piece of shit down into loving them and i will be SMITTEN. the gist of the show is that jessie (smart, very funny, quirky but not annoying about it) has a one night stand with movie star tom (handsome, charming, surprisingly sensitive?) and the entire series is basically about their stops and starts and i loved it so, so much. how did i not know this perfect show existed until now??? i love love! i love persevering against all odds!! i love heart-rending breakups!!! i love enemies-to-lovers!!!! i watched all three seasons in a couple days (ehh, i need a job) and i’m such a sicko that i’ve been listening to the soundtrack on a loop ever since? ANYWAY, what a great show. it makes you feel a lot of feelings, damn! and while we’re on the subject, some recent romance book faves:
everything’s fine cecilia rabess
royal holiday jasmine guillory
the art of catching feelings alicia thompson
experienced kate young
holy fuck we finally got an accountant 2 trailer and i am absolutely frothing at the mouth.
drag race this season is a dream come true and my personal power rankings mean nothing but here are my current top four nevertheless:
1 onya nerve (diva! hilarious! goddess! and we love us a midwestern queen!!!)
2 lexi love (i will never get over her roller skate routine, ever in my life, also i can’t believe they’re calling her auntie grandma?? at 33 years of age???? outrageous but i live for an “old” bitch)
3 jewels sparkles (sickening and funny, plus she scratches my deeply cursed and rotted jorgeous itch)
4 my dark horse sam star (a tiny little baby trinity??? oh yes ma’am)
5 honorable mentions to: lucky starzzzz, who was so gaggy and left way too soon; and also to the podcast drag her, which is so funny and stupid (complimentary).
i’ve been watching these painting videos as an alternative to learning how to meditate (boring) and they’re really beautiful and soothing. obviously the youtube algorithm knew i needed something low stakes with which to burn out my retinas and one day it served me a video of a dude using a damn chore boy to create a gorgeous painting and i was hooked. this guy is my favorite because i’ve spent the most time with him, although i have to mute his videos and put on some radiohead or james blake instead because the background songs he chooses make me feel like i’m on hold with walgreens, just straight up unlistenable. dude is fucking magical; how does one discover they can make art using some qtips and a fucking comb??? he’s obviously a genius????? in this one he uses a clothespin and a tampon (i think) to make a charming little forest! the shit is delightful!! i’m also deeply into squeegee painting, which i learned about from the instagram algorithm. i’m sorry but these computers really are my best friends. they anticipate my needs, they know what i want to sit and look at, they know how to make me laugh……….it’s gross and terrifying but i love them.
rest in peace, angie stone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
let’s run through a few more books, okay!
i know that divorce books are “hot” (pejorative) right now; i’ve read a couple recent criticisms of the genre and, frankly, despite having been written by women they both sounded kinda misogynist to me? last winter i read lyz lenz’s this american ex-wife and i’ve been a fan of hers for a long time so of course it did not disappoint. my lady read leslie jamison’s book splinters around that same time and loved it. i’m always down for a first-person account of a tectonic plate-shifting personal upheaval, i want to read about the illness or the baby or the move that changed someone’s life, especially if they write about it in excruciating detail. idk man, bearing witness to a person’s (sometimes) harrowing lived experience, especially from inside their head??? a fucking gift. anyway she’s such an incorrigible goblin and i can already hear her roasting me for being earnest, but i got an early copy of scaachi koul’s book sucker punch (out tomorrow) and it is great because she is a great writer. she’s also very mean, caustic, acerbic (all those type of words) and it’s a real treat to snuggle up and read a horrible bitch talking shit!!!
a few TV programs:
the pitt noah wylie hubba hubba cut me open heal me daddy
day of the jackal WOW BITCH WHAT A FUCKING SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!! watched it all the way through by myself, then watched the whole thing again with my lady. i love spy shit, i love lashana lynch, and why am i so sexually attracted to eddie redmayne? he’s so goddamn sexy??? every time his real face was onscreen i was barking at my fucking television.
apple cider vinegar give homegirl an emmy, three episodes in and even my ass was talking with an australian accent! also: REAL FUCKED-UP TEETH. should i start a rating system for movies and shows based on how realistic the teeth are? i’m about to get a subscription to britbox just for all the tea-colored teeth. i will report back on this.
speaking of real teeth: i’m watching this season of the white lotus just like everyone else is but idk if i like it? those incest siblings stress me out. what i do enjoy, though, is my girl aimee from sex education being back on my damn screen. is anyone cuter?? probably not!
i love liza treyger’s comedy and her netflix special night owl is good and funny so watch it. also i was really delighted by her grub street diet but i just gotta say: mannn the commenters are fucking joyless over there. every other one is somebody’s bitch grandma complaining that this woman doesn’t get enough fiber or whatever. fucking yuck, don’t read that humorless bullshit. sam jay’s special live in london is good too, kinda stand up/kinda documentary, like jerrod carmichael’s show but without making me want to peel my skin off like an orange. more comedy! this gina yashere bit about coming out as gay to her nigerian mom makes me cackle every time i come across it.
and a few more books:
i decided that this year i want to get more into short stories and mysteries and right now i’m combining the two, reading the new sara gran book little mysteries (nine miniature puzzles to confuse, enthrall, and delight) and i like it so much that i went to the library and got all the books in her detective claire dewitt series, and i’m like ten chapters into claire dewitt and the city of the dead and it’s so good, especially if you enjoy a blunt, not nice female narrator. the new curtis sittenfeld short story collection show don’t tell just came out, and i read everything curtis writes but her last collection you think it i’ll say it is at the top of the short story collections i force people to promise me they’ll read so i’m expecting this one to be banging, too. (the others that round out my “oh, you like short stories?” top of the dome suggestion list: rainbow rowell scattered showers, deesha philyaw the secret lives of church ladies, danielle evans the office of historical corrections, alissa nutting unclean jobs for women and girls!)
a few things on youtube:
-BILAL DID A FUCKING TINY DESK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you do not understand what this means to me. babes, i gasped so hard when it popped up on my homepage that i nearly collapsed a lung. bilal!!! singing at that little desk!!!!!!!! i cried. i might start crying now. he does when will u call, he fucking does SOUL SISTA???????? i am losing my mind.
-this nene compilation by “tired mama joyce wig” (scream!)
-john david and malcolm washington in the criterion closet i died and went to heaven. they call their dad BIG ZEL omgggggg. also, because i now can’t get enough of these beautiful and smart and sensitive and gorgeous men, this conversation between them about filmmaking and their careers is so sweet. i love them.
-this chris fleming bit guy who lies down in front of group photos made me laugh a whole lot and you should definitely watch his caleb hearon interview
-the longlegs guy and james wan adapted stephen king’s story “the monkey” (from skeleton crew) and i watched this trailer probably a dozen times before going to see it friday night, and the movie is so stupid and funny and gory, it’s perfect
-my favorite live performance of my favorite dave matthews band song
-this walton goggins AD tour (is anyone sexier than he is?? NO)
-damn this new netflix show adolescence looks good as hell?????
-kwame onwuachi’s food tour of new york (featuring nana!!!!!!!!!!!)
-trust me and just watch this it’s gorgeous
here is my diy recipe for a knockoff version of the nuts dot com apple pie trail mix and it is good. raw pepitas, roasted cashews (less salt is my preference but get what you like, who cares), diced dried cinnamon apples, sunflower seeds, yogurt chips: procure one pound of each, dump in a big resealable container or freezer bag, mix well, gorge as you see fit, enjoy your robust and fibrous bowel movements.
i don’t give a shit about fashion but i love looking at people with clothes on and i am obsessed with this fashion bro??? this kid is so gorgeous, like an eight foot tall slab of dark chocolate, and his style is so playful and he never limits himself, what a treat for my eyeballs!!!!
a few songs:
i took the L john roseboro
going in circles the friends of distinction (literally on repeat as i write this)
terrapin clairo
miss you much janet jackson
bigger de la soul
no budget niambi
rub til it bleeds pj harvey
partyman 3000 kyle walker
vibes don’t lie leon thomas (seXXXy)
buffalo hurray for the riff raff
love u bye!